The Fandom Awakens

I saw the latest installment of Star Wars on Friday. I had grown to loathe this movie by viewing time because of the inescapable hype. I then made a snarky comment on reddit that blew up enough to make the front page. I knew which character died within an hour. 

This didn't help since I'm highly critical of this franchise. The writing on the first 6 films sucks. While there are some funny moments, most of it makes on the smallest amount of sense necessary to keep the series afloat.  The character development is nonexistent. Leia's planet is blown up and we hear no more about it. Luke's entire family is flambeed but when he goes into battle, he wishes Ben/Boo Radley was there instead of the people who raised him. Anakin and Padme have no chemistry. When she said "I love you," I thought, "Are you sure?" Padme loses the will to live after seeing her babies born? That is the stupidest, most indefensible shit I've ever heard in my life and I've seen Trump at the Republican debates.

I went in prepared to hate this movie. I left with a new appreciation for the franchise. Contrary to what the previous paragraph would have you believe, I don't hate the franchise. I respect what it has done for popular culture but I saw it as an adult when you can't unsee plot holes and bad acting. The Force Awakens fixed most of the issues I had with Star Wars. It even passed the Bechdel Test!

The cast was diverse and talented. The story was interesting, made total sense, and ended in a way that had resolution and left room for the other 2 films we know are coming. The characters had motivations and desires that worked and they grew and changed as the story progressed. It was a good movie. I'd give it a 6.5 out of 10.

Why didn't I rate it higher? I want to give it a 7 but I have 2 major problems with this film and explaining those requires SPOILERS. You have been warned.

1) Cheap CGI

The new cantina scene was great. Maz (Lupita Nyong'o) was an excellent use of motion capture. However the junk dealer on Jakku? He looked ridiculous. I've seen enough episodes of Face Off to recognize the fat suit, foam, and paint that went into this character. It was very half-assed and again, took me out of the moment.

The worst offender was Kylo Ren's mentor. If you can nail Star Wars FaceTime in the prequels, Space Gollum should look better in here. For a big bad, he looked like the forgettable villain in a fairy tale cartoon for little kids. I don't care if he's 20 feet tall (you should call tech support about that BTW). If the Sith leader can look creepy and menacing on video conference, so can Space Gollum. 

2) Derp Vader

Someone kill the casting director. They nailed every character except Kylo Ren. Why did every other character work so well? Because they were either  already established in the universe or the new kids were played by unknowns except Derp Vader. He's played by Adam Driver, better known as Hannah Horvath's boyfriend on Girls.

The second I saw him without the mask, I couldn't take him seriously as a villain. Driver has gotten to much exposure as this weird idiot on an insanely popular show. FFS, one of the Obama kids interned on it! People associate him with this role. I couldn't unsee it and it took me out of the moment. Even his rage tantrums felt like Derp Boyfriend instead of Unstable Bad Guy.

While I'm on the rant, why does he have such nice hair under a freaking helmet? It's like he's out of a damn shampoo ad. Can you at least pretend to make him look different than Derp Boyfriend? Give him a military cut? Anything? How about a vague attempt to make him look like his parents? Derp Vader is a walking joke about the milkman. 

Did Driver do a good job? Yes. Had I never seen him before this, I'd think he was OK. A milkman joke but good. But I have seen him and it's like watching Rob Schneider as the bad guy.

Those two issues are going to be mostly my issues. Unless you've seen Girls, Kylo Ren hasn't been tainted for you. If you love, like, or merely tolerate Star Wars, go see this movie. It's the best in the franchise. The nerds were truly blessed this holiday season.

A Graphic Year Week 4: Thy Enemy Is Thyself

Working my way through the Minibus brought me next to Deadpool Kills Deadpool. Following the adventures of killing the Marvel universe and great heroes of literature in the multi-verse, Deadpool concludes that he must be the creator of these worlds instead of the inhabitants on the other side of the 4^th wall. Now he makes it his mission to kill all Deadpools to free them from the tyranny of suffering.

I think my favorite random Deadpools were Pandapool (the species that makes you extinct) and Groot Deadpool. Some of the other Deadpools were impressive. I may have to nickname a future pet Dogpool and the robot Deadpool was funny for all 5 panels he was in. It combined the violent insanity that is Deadpool with the philosophical nature that comes from (literally) fighting oneself. I felt like this really hit on the essence of this character.

The only downside is that I discovered a short, out-of-print series of the Deadpool Corp. Since this finally gave me the story on who blonde Deadpool (Wanda Wilson) was, I splurged and bought them. Fun fact, people will charge through the nose on out of print comics. I’m embarrassed to admit what I paid so I’m not going to. I’m not pleased with the amount I spent but I finally get the dish on Wanda and Dogpool so I’ll make my peace when the comics arrive. Next week, Deadpool Kills Carnage.

New Music: Title

My new album for January was Meghan Trainor’s Title. After her fantastic songs All about that Bass, Title, Dear Future Husband, and Your Lips Are Movin, I was really stoked for her album. Unfortunately, the best has already been heard.

Mr. Almost and Walkashame were fun (although I got sick of hearing her say her daddy knows she’s a good girl) but most of the other songs are forgettable. Overall it’s fun but all of her best stuff dropped before the album did. Plus Trainor has a repetitive style of song with a strong consistency of her ‘retro made new’ sound made the album feel redundant at times.

Title is an album for the digital age. It has a lot of great singles that sound unique until you hear the same thing 12 times in a row. It works best split onto playlists and shuffled with other songs. 

Kesha is a good example of the repetitive lyric and song style but messes with different beats, mixes, and several other elements to make her songs different from each other. Trainor needs to experiment with different elements in her songs more to keep her songs from bleeding together. 

I look forward to what Trainor will do in the future and I'll keep rocking the best of her current efforts.

I Scream, You Scream

I've been temping in Downtown Annapolis this week. I haven't been back here in quite some time but it's a very lovely area. My proximity to Main Street has caused me to realize the remarkable number of places to get dessert around here. There are 3 homemade ice cream places within a couple of blocks of each other.

I decided to test and compare. I only focused on the shops that didn't have a big brand. The cafe with Hershey's ice cream got skipped. I ranked flavor, portion to price, and flavor variety.

Kilwins
Closer to the waterfront, Kilwins has almost any sweet confection you could crave from fudge to chocolate to caramel apples. I went for the ice cream. Their flavors are mostly traditional but one of the standouts was Peruvian chocolate which was supposed to be richer than regular chocolate. I tried my standard cookies and cream and limited edition raspberry cheesecake.

Flavor: 4 scoops
The flavors were strong and the ice cream rich.

Portion to price: 3 scoops
It was a little close to standard city prices for my liking but the portions didn't skimp.

Variety: 3 scoops
All of the flavors were fairly traditional but appealed to a variety of pallets (chocolate, fruity, caramel, etc.)


Annapolis Ice Cream Company
I noticed this place because of all the stuffed penguins in the windows. They light and fun atmosphere continued inside. Customers can decorate a spoon and have it become part of display. There were pages of spoons on a flip display like at a poster store.

Because of the large flavor selection, not all the cases are visible so there are screens on the wall displaying what isn't front and center. The portion sizes were also unusual. I'd never seen a "scoop and a half" as an option. I got two scoops not realizing that any place with half a scoop as an option is going to be heavy handed with their distribution.

Flavor: 4 scoops
I got peanut butter vanilla and strawberry Oreo. The peanut butter vanilla was perfect. Rich and with a strong peanut butter taste. It overpowered the strawberry Oreo a bit but that was more my pairing.

Portion to price: 5 scoops
I got 75% of a pint of ice cream for less than a container of Ben and Jerry's. I was very satisfied.

Variety: 4 scoops
Most of the combinations are a mash-up of traditional flavors in rarely seen pairings such as strawberry and mint Oreo, maple walnut, Nutella vanilla, coconut chocolate chip, and coffee Heath bar to name a few. Some of the rarer flavors I saw were blackberry and key lime.

Capital Cakes and Cream
The shop is a bit back from the street but the sign is what brought me in. Like Kilwins, it doesn't stop at ice cream. There was a variety of cupcakes as well. I think hedging its dessert bets, CC&C was able to skip some of the cupcake fall out. All of their ice cream comes from a farm in Cecil County so when people say you're buying local, this shop means it 100%.

Small with pink paint and nice design touches, CC&C made the most of the space. The staff was very willing to let me try several samples since I had trouble making up my mind. Some of the flavors were the standard cookies and cream, cookie dough, and moose tracks but with cutesy names. For the shop pink shop with a cupcake tower, it worked.

Flavor: 4 scoops
Independence Explosion (vanilla with raspberry and blueberry swirls) was tempting but I opted for Cookie Monters (blue vanilla with Oreo, cookie dough, and additional cookies) and Mootella (a delicious chocolate-Nutella flavor).

My only complaint was that the ice cream wasn't as rich as the other two. Without the comparison to the others, it would have been a great local kind of Ben and Jerry's (they love stuff in their ice cream). But next to the others, it was a bit weak.

Portion to price: 4 scoops
I got one scoop of each flavor. After Annapolis Ice Cream Company, I was initially a little disappointed in the portion size. Then I heard the price. My first thought was "That works for me." I found the prices very reasonable in relation to the portion size.

Variety: 5 scoops
In addition to traditional flavors, CC&C has a variety of fun and interesting combos. Most of the variety is based on additions to regular flavors but they appeal to folks who like sweet or fruity. They also had two Italian ice style options.

Conclusion
Annapolis Ice Cream Company wins for overall flavor quality but CC&C has such a diverse flavor selection that it shouldn't be forgotten. It's all a matter of preferring simple and rich flavors or liking variety and add-ons in your ice cream. I say, why choose?

One of the perks of being a grown-up is deciding if you want to have ice cream as a meal. And then eating vegetables and fish for the next 2 days so your doctor won't bitch about your cholesterol.

Current Music: Wide Sargasso Sea by Stevie Nicks

Baker's Dozen Challenge Book 7

For Another World I started the Wild Card series edited by George R. R. Martin. I LOVE the premise for this series. Right after WWII an alien virus is released on earth that is a total wild card. The infected will either draw the black queen (die), become deformed or mutated (jokers), or gain a power (aces). Sometimes it's hard to tell if someone is a joker or an ace. The uninfected or with a dormant strain are called nats or naturals.

I loved the grit and realism and darkness of these stories. The fate of the four aces and Tachyon (the lone alien who survived the trip and tried to stop the virus) is a very realistic portrayal of human nature and it's failures. It's disappointing but that's life especially during the McCarthy era. We also saw how people can become heroes with Stop Watch and Turtle so that was a nice boost. Ghost Girl brought some levity just trying to get through one bad night.

The stories here inspire disappointment, hope, disgust, and most other emotions you would expect if something like this happened in our world. The variety of powers and deformities was fascinating. The telepathic bartender with no eyes, the brain trust who had trouble with so many minds living in her head, the girl who stopped being human to cope with her pain.

My biggest problem was how long it took me to finish the book. It was a combination of being busy, being distracted, and 600 pages of fiction. I enjoyed almost everything I read but I was ready to be done. The appendix was a nice touch though. The 'nonfiction' scientific pieces helped add to the world and round out the main narrative.

The depravity and ugliness of the world didn't bother me but I can see where some parts may disturb others. It's not for the faint or heart but I went into it warned. If you like the premise and can handle some darkness, give this series a shot.

1) Another World – Wild Cards edited by George R. R. Martin (Wild Cards #1)

2) Learned Something –

3) Movie-Book – The Fault in Out Stars by John Green

4) Graphic Novel – Fanboys vs. Zombies Vol 1 by Sam Humphries

5) Dust –

6) Nonfiction –

7) Reread – Ready Player One by Ernest Cline (as read by Wil Wheaton)

8) Shorts – 20something Essays by 20something Writers edited by Matt Kellogg and Jillian Quint

9) Fiction – The Rosie Project by Graeme Simison

10) Shiny – Dear Mr. Knightley by Katherine Reay

11) Retelling –

12) Wild Card –

13) The End –

Music: Virus by Abney Park

About About Time

About Time is the story of Tim who discovers the men in his family can travel back in their own timelines and do things differently. Because most of these men aren’t big players in history, their actions haven’t had any major consequences for the larger world but that doesn’t mean consequences don’t happen to them.

I love that the protagonist is awkward, bumbling, and sweet. He’s not an action star or ridiculously good looking but a normal, dorky guy. I know guys like Tim and I was definitely rooting for him. He had this amazing power and used it wisely. The message was about the time we have and enjoying our lives which is a little hackneyed but was done differently enough that I liked it.

The words I keep coming back to are quiet and sweet. Tim had an ordinary life with an extraordinary thing he used in small ways. He had a wonderful family and used his ability to get the most out of them. A typical guy might be a little bored but most women will enjoy it. I’m not a romantic and I had a good time.

Also, anyone else find it odd that this is the second ‘moving in time’ movie Rachel McAdams has done? That plot line isn’t over done yet. I smell typecasting.

Music: Unconditionally by Katy Perry

PRISM Isn’t So Shiny

Katy Perry’s new album dropped today and it has been hyped like carzy. There were promos for the first single and music video only to sound very similar to Brave by Sara Barielles. Many of us were a little disappointed. For me, that trend continued with the actual album.

I was hoping for a really interesting record since Perry went through a divorce that had her contemplating whether or not she should go on. Unfortunately Perry saw her new love John Mayer as better material than a divorce that pushed her to the edge. There are 16 tracks on the deluxe album. Four of those tracks are about loss, the difficulty of relationships, self love, and bouncing back. It’s five if you count Ghost but I found that one to be fairly standard. Eight are fluff-tastic love songs.

Of the love songs, Dark Horse has a new and interesting sound that suits Perry well. Unconditionally is lovely if a little sentimental for my tastes. This Moment is very good because the lyrics are slightly more multi-faceted. I found the other five to be fairly forgettable.

I found the darker songs so much more personal and interesting. Everyone sings about how wonderful love is but what the other side? I loved hearing about owning your role in the demise of a relationship or how you have to choose your battles. Apparently Perry or the label didn’t because those tracks are only on the deluxe album.

I like the stuff about the demise of her marriage so much more than the sugary love songs. It’s more personal, more interesting, and pretty original for pop music. After being promised a darker version of Katy Perry and being handed 50% lovey-dovey nonsense, I’m really disappointed.

The other tracks were likeable but Firework is a better anthem than Roar and Part of Me is a better ‘over it’ song than Ghost. The silly/fun songs This Is How We Do and International Smile don’t apply to anyone who noticed the recession. They’re also less interesting than California Gurls, Last Friday Night, or Peacock.

Despite how it sounds, I do like PRISM. However, I think Teenage Dream had a more cohesive sound and was, overall, a better record. I’m not sure any record could have stood up to the expectations and publicity. The more you hype something, the more it has to live up to that hype.

For the mega-publicized, darker side of Katy Perry, PRISM is fun but doesn’t deliver.

Iron Man 3

My friend had advance passes so I got in to see Iron Man 3 a couple of days early. It is absolutely worth seeing. We all have demons, we all have scars, even superheroes.

This film did an excellent job of humanizing Tony Stark. Unlike many of his counterparts in Avengers, Tony Stark is just ‘a man with a plan.’ He’s not a god, a super soldier, or a man with anger issues. In New York, he was willing to sacrifice himself but managed to survive. That would leave anyone with scars and a big part of this story is him dealing with them. Too few superhero stories deal with the mental and emotional toll saving the world takes. I’m so glad they did it here.

I also thought the villain was incredible. Super villains often reflect the fears and anxieties of society at large. This villain wasn’t aliens or a god from another realm; he was a terrorist. He valued anonymity and didn’t care if anyone ever knew his name. He had an amazing weapon and he wanted to keep it from the world.

I can’t say too much without revealing major plot elements but Iron Man gets more impressive and more human this time. I loved it.

Music: Live to Rise by Soundgarden

Not Fit2 Read

I got Fit2Fat2Fit by Drew Manning from the library recently. In a nutshell: A personal trainer who has always been a super-fit health nut lives like the rest of super sized America. He lets himself go for six months and then spends the next six months whipping himself into shape. It started as a blog and became a book.

I think this was an amazing idea. For people who’ve always been thin or always loved exercise, y’all just don’t get it. Manning decided to do what it took to empathize with his clients. That’s great and it would have made an excellent documentary.

This is hands down the worst book I’ve read this year, probably in the last two years. The writing is terrible. Not even the ghost writer could save this enough to make me like it and I really wanted to like it.

Manning has been built like the friggin’ Hulk for most of his life. He spent 50 pages of a 200+ page book on what it was like to get fat and that includes his wife’s chapter. You completely rewrite your physical form and lifestyle and that’s all you’ve got? 

I’ve been larger than life for many years. Restrict me to the last six months and I can still give you more than that in a day. I wanted more. I needed more. If he didn’t have more in him, the book was a mistake. If more was on his blog, why isn’t it in the damn book?

It was compelling to hear about a fit person finally know how the rest of us feel. Society is very scornful of anyone above a certain size. The only people it’s PC to hate are Nazis, zombies, and the obese. Manning felt very judged when he goes back to the gym even though most people probably paid him no mind. 

He makes some excellent points about fitness in the latter half of the book: Form is key for fitness, variety is vital to stave off boredom, set yourself up for success. Getting to them was tedious, dull, and, at times, condescending. Please explain to me WTF John F. Kennedy has to do with fitness? It makes no sense and sounds remarkably pretentious for a memoir with a text message title.

As much as I wanted to like this book, I hated it. I got almost no enjoyment out of reading it. I still think what Manning did was extraordinary. I have a lot of respect for him. So long as he never writes another book, he’ll keep it.

Current Jams: Blown Away by Carrie Underwood

The Girl

Hitchcock created some amazing films. He was also notoriously hard on actors, especially Tippi Hedren. The Girl looks at his relationship with an actress plucked from obscurity and sent back to it on his whim.

I loved the pacing of this movie. It doesn’t drag its feet at all but it was never rushed either. It took just enough time to do its tale justice. This drama does a better job of building tension than most scary movies I’ve seen. When portraying the five days of live bird attacks Hedren endured, I felt the tension and fear. They did a great job of creating empathy within the audience.

Julian Jarrold did an outstanding job mirroring Hithcock’s own movies here. It’s subtle but if you’re a fan of Hitchcock, you’ll recognize and appreciate what this adds to the story. Other echoes of Hitchcock are seen in Toby Jones’s portrayal of the director. Hitch is just as sinister as any of his villains. Jones found the balance between the vulnerable boy within the man without removing any of his darkness.

I’ve heard so much about Sienna Miller being a world class party girl than acting. It’s nice to know she has some real talent. I’m not sure how close the story is to fact but it definitely makes you wonder.

Current Music: I Knew You Were Trouble by Taylor Swift

Pitch Isn't Quite Perfect

I finally got around to seeing Pitch Perfect. If you haven’t yet, just wait for the DVD. It’s worth a rental but not the $10 for a matinee.

The cast is excellent, the acting is good, and the music is the reason to watch the movie. The writing is the reason to rent it in a couple of months. 

Anna Kendrick’s character (Becca) is the standard tough girl who doesn’t need anyone but you see her soften up. Once she realizes what she’s doing, she backpedals to her old ways but hard. I can appreciate her being a bitch but not without a reason why. It’s hinted at but never fully explained. Sometimes it was difficult to like her.

The control freak character is amusing in her crazy and but she changes too quickly and easily. She goes from hating Becca to letting her save the day. Can you spend another 3 minutes of movie getting there please? 

The humor is pretty good. The characters are over the top but in a good way. However, a movie targeted at women is not the place to spotlight vomit jokes. There’s a line between well used and gross-that-ain’t-right. Pitch Perfect perforated that line. 

There’s a lot of talent in this cast. The actors were in The Help, 50/50, Hairspray, and Bridesmaids to name a few. This movie came close to utilizing their potential but it was almost not quite.

Pitch Perfect is predictable but fun. The cast is young and pretty so staring at them for 2 hours isn’t difficult. Rebel Wilson is perpetually hilarious. I loved all of the a capella songs and the mash-ups. Some of those needed to be on the soundtrack. Srsly.

Current Music: The Riff-Off by The Barden Bellas, The Trebel Makers, and the BU Harmonics

I'm Gonna Love It

Last night I was able to get into an advance screening of Wreck-It Ralph. For those who don’t know (all three of you) this is Disney-Pixar’s latest film. It’s about a video game character who was tired of always being the bad guy. When the arcade is closed and the video game characters can be themselves, many of the villains and heroes hang out. Not in Ralph’s game.

He’s tired of being left out and hated. He wants to be the good guy for once and leaves his video game to try and do it. There was an excellent cast of voice actors for both the major and minor characters. It was a good blend of character actors and better known big names. (Try to figure who is Mindy Kaling and Alan Tudyk.) Despite finding Sarah Silverman incredibly annoying in real life, I loved how she portrayed her character.

The locations were within the games were excellent. Because Ralph’s game is celebrating 30 years, those characters move in a way that shows their retro nature. In Hero’s Duty, it showcased the hi-def of most first person shooters.

The story had everything you would expect out of a Pixar movie: a good plot, a heartbreaking moment, and entertaining characters. As important as the villain ultimately is, I thought (s)he could have used a touch more back story and development. (Since they took our cell phones at the door and wanded us, I will reveal nothing.)

I’d give it a 4.5 out of 5.

Current Music: Bug Hunt (Noisa Remix) by Skillerx